Thursday, January 10, 2008

A New Format

With the advent of the New Year, I am finding it more and more difficult to keep up with the rigid requirements of writing and maintaining a blog. My work here in Moscow coupled with the desire to travel and learn Russian has forced me into a position that I thought I would never take. Therefore, it is with much regret that I have decided to open my forum to other writers. In my opinion this is the only way to return this earth shattering blog back to its original state of relevance and efficiency. Now, I realize that there are some who wait anxiously for the opportunity to digest my scraps of wisdom and may be disappointed by this decision. I would like to assure them that I will not completely disappear from this forum. I still intend to author the occasional "Tales from Home" entries as well as any updates concerning my life in Russia. So don't worry! Anyway, and without further ado, I would like to introduce the first three (of what will hopefully be many) future writers on this forum.

When it comes to politics, I have always thought the the true nature of any political movement can be seen by looking at its extremes. In my opinion, American politics has always shown a desire for conservatism and traditionalism over what appears (to me at least) to be the infinite possibilities of progress. This can be seen most evidently in the actions of the so called "liberal" Democratic Party who differ from their "conservative" Republican opponents in little more than specific hot button issues, while touting the same line of business, religion, and American democracy. While it is not my place to delve into the nuances of this argument, my disgust at the seeming lack of desire for real progress made me realize the necessity of a voice who could show the world the dangers of conservatism. As a result, when searching for possible political contributors to my blog, I realized that it would be irresponsible of me just search only geographic locations. Therefore, I also chose to search through time and space itself in order to find just the right person capable of the kind of material relevant to this forum. My search eventually led me to to Patrick Cherniburg from Hartford, Connecticut. Born in in 1855, he grew up in a wealthy American family during the the turmoil of the American Civil War. The fighting and subsequent victory of the Union proved to Patrick that America was destined for greatness..., as long as it stuck to the values of his formative years. As he grew older, he became more and more angry about perceived strays from his idealized past. I brought him to the modern day to see what he would say about modern politics and events, (of course with my own ulterior motives). I have to warn you, that many of Patrick's writings may seem politically incorrect, but unfortunately that term is not even a part of his lexicon, so you will just have to bare with him.

While I have discussed my own affection for liberal politics, I have to admit that I have a genuine dislike for many liberal people. They are the first to bemoan the corporate evils of companies like Mcdonald's and Walmart while letting themselves be manipulated by the prefabricated "coolness" of places like Panera Bread and Starbucks. Their bachelor degrees give them an unfathomable pretension, that causes them to look down on the very people their politics claim shouldn't be ignored. Naturally, all I had to do was enter a coffee shop to find someone who thinks that they can make a difference just by writing on a internet forum. After a five minute search I found Julie Brown, a 27 year old teacher from Oregon. I hope that her views can somehow be educated enough to counter the irrational rambling of Patrick, but I somehow doubt her M.A. in anthropology will be able to achieve even that.

Finally, I thought it would be good to invite an intellectual to write for my blog. His unnecessarily intense scrutiny of every aspect of life will in no way further the human race, but it will finally give us that much needed insight into the life of 14th century Chinese blacksmiths, or better, the philosophical messages in the movie "Ghost". Fortunately, the untenured professor Philip Dumat is so wrapped up in his studies, that he doesn't realize that his life's work will only be read by other people whose life work is to read the irrelevant ramblings of people like him. While Professor Dumat's inability to connect with the world at large may be detrimental to any attempts at a social life, I found his plight perfect for writing occasional uncompensated blogs. His Ph.D in philosophy means that he will have deep and altogether useless commentary about certain aspects of the world. Of course this may be hard to stomach or even worse, it could be excruciatingly boring. Fortunately, we can take solace that his great intellectual promise has been wasted for the sake of our collective amusement.

In conclusion, I would like my readers to have patience with my new format. I feel that the inclusion of these new writers may jump start the creative juices that have slowly left me over the past year and a half. In any event, if this turns out to be a huge failure, I can always send them packing, and find a new means of achieving my goals. In any case, the first new entry will appear next week, so please stay tuned

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